The Stand In
1 day ago
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Candid Camera is now Punk'd, I Guess
Yesterday I went to the bank, and I went through the drive-through lane. There were three lanes in total, and I went into the empty one. While I was waiting, the person in the far lane got the tube thingy back, and they proceeded to back out of the drive-through lane. Obviously there was no one behind them, but there also wasn't anything blocking their way forward. The person next to me had a small trailer behind their truck, and they also backed out of the drive-through lane. There was plenty of room for them to get through the front with the trailer. I was perplexed by this time, and I looked all around for hidden cameras, but saw none (that's why they're called hidden, I suppose). I resolved that I was not going to be one of those people who just blindly does what other people do before them, wrong or not, and left in a forward motion. Thankfully I did not explode or run over a bunch of glass or end up on Youtube, but it was strange nonetheless.
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Breaking The Law (Unintentionally)
I consider myself a law-abiding citizen. Not just federal law, but really rules of any kind, which I suppose is boring to some people. I don't really speed much anymore; my last speeding ticket was 10 years ago, but this decision grew out of my very first car accident 4 years ago, which wasn't my fault. I try my best to keep on the straight and narrow in everything I do. Having said that, I'm going to tell you about the time I broke into a Burger King.
My friend Jeff and I became obsessed with Pink Floyd while in high school, and we heard that tickets were going on sale for a Roger Waters solo show in Madison Square Garden. We decided that we would go and wait in line for tickets at midnight, figuring there would be a long line. We hit the Foodtown and bought lots of drinks and snacks to tide us over, then we headed to the late Cheap Thrills in New Brunswick, which was the closest place that was selling tickets to the show.
We got there around midnight, and there wasn't anyone there. There was a parking lot behind the store, so we parked there and waited for awhile in the car, thinking that we would go and get in line when someone else showed up. By 3 am, no one had come, and we needed to go to the bathroom. We got out of the car and started to walk up the street, and we saw a Burger King that was lit up. We assumed that it was open since all the lights were on. The fact that we didn't see anyone didn't bother us, since it was 3 in the morning.
Jeff grabbed the handles on both of the glass entrance doors and pulled them open. We went straight back to the bathroom and decided to get some food on our way out. We went to the counter and looked at the menu for a few minutes, waiting for someone to come and take our order. No one did, so we ended up leaving. On our way out, we noticed that one of the doors that we had opened had a deadbolt sticking out of it. Technically, the doors were locked, but the door without the deadbolt wasn't deadbolted to the ground, so that's why we were able to open them. When we realized that we had just walked into a closed and locked Burger King, we freaked out and tried to put the doors back, to no avail. We speed-walked back to the car, hoping that no one had seen us.
The smart thing to do, of course, would have been to leave, but the Roger Waters tickets were far too important, so we stayed in the parking lot. No one ever came by, so we thought we were in the clear. People started to appear around 7 and we got out of the car to get in line. At around 8, a police car that was riding by came to a halt right where we were standing. We were sure we were going to be arrested and tried to disappear into the sidewalk. The policeman only rolled down his window and asked what the line was for. Someone else answered and the policeman went about his business, much to our relief. After that, we never waited in line for tickets again.
I was reminded of this incident yesterday when I went to the ATM. The ATM at our bank is on the side of the building, and you can drive up to it. Unfortunately, there is usually a lot of glare on the screen, making it hard to see. I was trying to make a withdrawal, and somehow I managed to get to the DOS menu screen for the ATM! I once again freaked out, thinking that the bank was going to think I was trying to steal money from the ATM. Luckily I was able to see the last option on the menu, which was "8 Return." I pressed 8 and it went to a screen that said the ATM was not in service. I was about to pull away when it went back to the normal screen, and I was able to make my withdrawal. I am hopeful that this will be my last act as a criminal, because it's very stressful.
My friend Jeff and I became obsessed with Pink Floyd while in high school, and we heard that tickets were going on sale for a Roger Waters solo show in Madison Square Garden. We decided that we would go and wait in line for tickets at midnight, figuring there would be a long line. We hit the Foodtown and bought lots of drinks and snacks to tide us over, then we headed to the late Cheap Thrills in New Brunswick, which was the closest place that was selling tickets to the show.
We got there around midnight, and there wasn't anyone there. There was a parking lot behind the store, so we parked there and waited for awhile in the car, thinking that we would go and get in line when someone else showed up. By 3 am, no one had come, and we needed to go to the bathroom. We got out of the car and started to walk up the street, and we saw a Burger King that was lit up. We assumed that it was open since all the lights were on. The fact that we didn't see anyone didn't bother us, since it was 3 in the morning.
Jeff grabbed the handles on both of the glass entrance doors and pulled them open. We went straight back to the bathroom and decided to get some food on our way out. We went to the counter and looked at the menu for a few minutes, waiting for someone to come and take our order. No one did, so we ended up leaving. On our way out, we noticed that one of the doors that we had opened had a deadbolt sticking out of it. Technically, the doors were locked, but the door without the deadbolt wasn't deadbolted to the ground, so that's why we were able to open them. When we realized that we had just walked into a closed and locked Burger King, we freaked out and tried to put the doors back, to no avail. We speed-walked back to the car, hoping that no one had seen us.
The smart thing to do, of course, would have been to leave, but the Roger Waters tickets were far too important, so we stayed in the parking lot. No one ever came by, so we thought we were in the clear. People started to appear around 7 and we got out of the car to get in line. At around 8, a police car that was riding by came to a halt right where we were standing. We were sure we were going to be arrested and tried to disappear into the sidewalk. The policeman only rolled down his window and asked what the line was for. Someone else answered and the policeman went about his business, much to our relief. After that, we never waited in line for tickets again.
I was reminded of this incident yesterday when I went to the ATM. The ATM at our bank is on the side of the building, and you can drive up to it. Unfortunately, there is usually a lot of glare on the screen, making it hard to see. I was trying to make a withdrawal, and somehow I managed to get to the DOS menu screen for the ATM! I once again freaked out, thinking that the bank was going to think I was trying to steal money from the ATM. Luckily I was able to see the last option on the menu, which was "8 Return." I pressed 8 and it went to a screen that said the ATM was not in service. I was about to pull away when it went back to the normal screen, and I was able to make my withdrawal. I am hopeful that this will be my last act as a criminal, because it's very stressful.
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